Went to my office to collect my final cheque! As I requested for early release, I did not receive a full month's salary.. but it's fine, cos I get to stay home and rest and not deal with shitty politics anymore!
Aaahh! It's great to be able to smile and breathe in the fresh air of freedom! No more stress and worry about factors you cannot control and no more pressure to prove my worth or do things that I know some people will never know/learn how to appreciate.
Thinking back, I do not regret these 3 years as I've travelled to many countries, met many people from all walks of life and had the opportunity to live out one of my childhood ambition -- which was to be a tourleader. :)
What's next?
I honestly don't know!! But I am irritated and frustrated that some my ex-colleagues are gossiping or speculating which travel agency I am defecting to. Now I know how those poor celebrities feel when the gossip rags bitch about them (even though I am no celebrity).
Before I joined CTC Holidays, I was a super newbie like with zero experience and zero knowledge of the travel industry.. fortunately my travel bug mother had brought me to some places for holidays and I am a fast learner.. so managed to learn a lot in a short span of 3 years. Moreover my manager, Jennifer really taught me a lot and covered up for many of my carelessness and mistakes that I've made in the beginning.. Some were so grave, I don't know whether to laugh or cry when I think about them now.
So, I think that it is kinda like a betrayal if I go to a competitor's agency immediately after I quit from CTC. It may seem that I was poached, or I am doing it out of spite, when in fact I quit without a back-up plan. I do not have any job offers or intention to look for a job when I handed in my resignation letter.
It's just that word kinda spread, and suddenly there are calls from managers/bosses from other travel companies inviting me to work for them. I am honored and kinda flattered as I am still consider a newbie in this trade with no colourful resume or fantastic knowledge or skills... Either I have good friends in right places or I have very good luck or maybe they got the wrong Jasmine Tay? Haha.
In total, I have 5 job offers at hand now, and since all of them are from different industries including the travel trade.. it is so difficult to make a choice as all of them open up different doors that will lead to different things in my life. I am at one of the most important crossroads of my life. Sigh. Another milestone.
So.. why did I quit?
Well, in any situation, be it work or school or relationship... when one party keeps giving and giving and giving, one day he/she will reach a maximum boiling point. For me, instead of self-destruction or being bitter, I chose to walk away. It's my SOP (standard operating procedure) for dealing with problems. Most of the time, I walk away and choose not to have any direct confrontations. Some may say I am a coward, some may say I like to avoid solving problems. But has it occurred to you that walking away is also a solution to a problem? Being mature enough to take the heat and label of being a loser and walk away when in fact you are just trying to resolve the issue by taking yourself out of the situation and reduce any "injuries"?
Did anyone call Switzerland a coward for sitting out from the World War? What about Thailand? Perhaps you may think they are cowards, but by not being involved in the war, they minimized their losses and saved their citizens' lives and properties. Is that a brave and mature thing to do? You may disagree, but this is my own personal opinion.
Fighting back may not always be the bravest thing to do.
Not everyone sees things the way I do, and I do admit that I can be strange and weird sometimes cos I do not think or do things the conventional way.. but as long as the end results is what I desire, who cares how I get there? I don't care about the process/journey but only the end result.
And, I believe that my virtues are my strengths and not weaknesses. Being honest, truthful and straightforward should be encouraged and not discouraged. With constructive feedback comes improvement and advancement. Some people may get ahead with lies and backstabbing and playing stupid pointless politic "games", but at the end of the day, if you don't have the capability nor talent nor effort, it's just a house of cards that you are building up that will collapse at the slightest pressure. Period.
I enjoy travelling and meeting new people. I would love to continue to be a tourleader for a few more years and travel the world.. however I don't see how I can do that in CTC, nor I do not want to be labelled a defector and go to another company at this point in time..
And though one may say I need not care what others may say about me, well.. personally I don't give a fuck what others may say about my actions/words or whatever since I'm used to being flamed and insulted since like so long ago, BUT I do care about my reputation and image. People may call me a bitch or a slut.. but they do not have the proof to back that up. So it's just a baseless conjecture or a personal attack -- which i honestly don't bother. But by doing that jumping company thingy, i will give people an opportunity to spread gossips about my reputation and image which I do care a lot about.
So for now, I shall sit back and relax enjoy my well deserved break for the next few weeks.
Celebrated Mother's Day early on 8th May 2010 as my siblings have to be with their new stepmum for the actual day celebration.
